>(refrain)

Bubba; the singing catfish, fit to be fried,
Your outrageous talk leaves us fit to be tied.
Bubba, oh Bubba, you’re still quite a dish,
Hangin’ out on the wall like a filet-o-fish.

(background guitar vamp)

Bubba’s been fishnapped, with no ransom that could rescue him from the clutches of La Petite, who couldn’t stand hearing “Bad to the Bone” any more and hid Bubba high up in a closet. Unfortunately, her brother grew, and grew, and became tall enough to search the highest shelves of his closet and find his old friend, Bubba!!

Repeat refrain.

(background guitar vamp)
Bubba’s been eaten, too. Chewed up by a sneaky rabbit who liked the taste of vinyl, soft rubbery material, and found this funny looking fish to be the perfect material for gnawing. Bubba’s tail is down to nothing, but its hard plastic base still tries to wave when he says, “Hey, drop me a line sometime!” The head? There’s not much left. Maybe he needs to join the scarecrow in singing “If I only had a brain!”
(guitar improvises a short lick from Wizard of Oz tune)

Repeat refrain.

(background guitar vamp)
Bubba, the survivor fish, has been thrown across the room in frustration. Darn thing goes off when we’re not ready for it; sometimes even the television blinking will set him off to announce “I’m bustin’ outta here tonight; you with me?” Bubba, the adults in the house would be happy to oblige. Garbage night, perhaps? You’re too big to flush down the toilet like a requiem for a pet goldfish.

Bubba, oh Bubba, ne’er to be fried
We’d go on without you; believe me, we’ve tried.
Bubba, oh Bubba, your history’s long
And storied, I’ll say, as I finish this song.

>It was almost a typical Saturday.
The to-do list read as usual:
Laundry
Correct papers
Clean kitchen
Clean bunny cage

Added to the list yesterday:
Prepare Halloween candy for trick or treaters
Set up pumpkin, light candle
Start fire in fireplace
Rake leaves off sidewalk so trick or treaters can find their way

Here’s the Ta-Dah! list:
Laundry (dull, boring, but necessary chore, got done in between everything else)
Correct papers: lots of them! (Science, spelling, language arts, and more science: more than usual due to make-up work in the latest wave of H1N1 in my school building)
Clean kitchen, and re-do it after supper (and wonder why I manage to want to run the dishwasher when there’s a load of laundry in, every time)
Clean bunny cage (Why does she get so anxious when I’m taking away her dirty box? I replace it with a clean one right away. She doesn’t have to wait.)
Rake leaves: done, but only in the front yard and only enough to clear the sidewalk. It was so windy that raking is almost pointless, like shoveling 2 inches of snow when there’s a dozen more coming. (Did I say snow? I didn’t mean to even think of snow. Not yet. You didn’t hear that.)
Prepare Halloween candy; I tested one of each kind to make sure they were all fresh. It’s a dirty job, but someone’s got to do it.
I set up the pumpkin, but it was too windy to light the candle. Next year, we’re getting the battery operated tea lights.
Start fire: while I was out replenishing the candy supply, Hubs started a fire. Sort of. Eventually. It was kind of like this.
1. Open damper.
2. Set up wood.
3. Set up firestarters in form of old Braille paper or cardboard.
4. Light fire.
5. Realize damper was left open after last fire, and now it’s closed.
6. Open damper.
7. Take down smoke alarms.
8. Turn on ceiling fan, open windows a crack, turn off heat.
9. Blow on fire; get it started, finally, for real.
10. Wait patiently for house to clear of smoke.
11. Sample new supply of Halloween candy to make sure it’s suitable for late trick or treaters.
12. Settle down on couch in den – Ah. Saturday night. Life is good.

Now the to-do list begins for Sunday. That, folks, totally revolves around the Big Game that kicks off at 3:15 at Lambeau Field.