>Mug shots and Secret Santas

>The Secret Santa Saga has ended. It was fun, as always. No Deer Droppings this year (that one is legend now), and no inflatable cows singing “Blooooo Christmas”, either, but we did have a good time. I had the name of a first grade teacher, and she came over to my room Friday to tell me how much she enjoyed the gifts and the “chase” to find them at times. Thanks to my Santa, my mug collection has grown, including the “Smart Mug” that was my final gift. I’ll probably use it when I’m driving the long roads early Saturday mornings on my way to judge music festivals. Each mug came with at least one flavored coffee, with a final inventory of: Candy Cane, Chocolate Amaretto, Gingerbread, Chestnuts by the Fire, Hot Butter Rum, and After Dinner Mint. (The pig/reindeer behind them is one of my favorite decorations, trying to edge its nose into the picture.) Upon delivery of the last gift, the identity of my Santa was revealed.

It was my boss, the school principal.

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>The Best Christmas (Pageant) Ever

>I finished reading the book The Best Christmas Pageant Ever to my class today. Sixth graders, remember, with the beginnings of middle-school angst, ‘cool’ attitude, and a lot of excess pre-holiday energy. If you’ve never read it, the book tells the story of a standard church pageant disrupted by a rowdy family of kids who don’t know the Christmas story, much less understand the etiquette of a church play. They turn up for Sunday School at first because they hear a rumor that there’s free food to be had.
Through the turmoil of casting, rehearsing, and the disaster of dress rehearsal, the nasty Herdman kids keep everyone on their toes. They bully their way into the main roles. They resist the status quo, asking questions like, “Who is this Herod guy, anyway?”
Eventually, the pageant goes on. It’s not your typical Christmas show. ‘Mary’ burps the baby loudly, the shepherds are truly afraid of the Angel (she’s beaten most of them up on occasion), and the Wise Men offer a ham from the family’s donation basket instead of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. But when all is said and done, there’s a feeling of calm, an overall realization that maybe it really was like this was for the Holy Family. Maybe the glorified paintings and perfect-hair Marys weren’t as realistic as this one, the rowdy girl with a black eye saying, “Hey! Get your hands off the baby!”
A girl in my class came up to me at recess this morning right after I finished the book. She said very thoughtfully, “You know, I think that pageant was exactly right. It wasn’t fancy, it wasn’t fake, and the kids in it really had a chance to think about and understand the story. All Christmas pageants should be like that.”
I had a lump in my throat. This young woman is barely 11 years old, rather spacey and forgetful, and has been quite sad lately with friendships gone awry. Yet somehow, with this book, she felt touched, moved, even calm. She seemed ready to face recess and her friends again, despite the turmoil around her. Somehow, after talking to her, I could no longer play the Grinch. I couldn’t feel any Humbug, either.
Thanks, kiddo. You made my day. I hope I contributed in some positive way to yours.

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>Random thoughts on Secret Santas

>It’s Secret Santa time at my workplace, and we really, really get into it. We enlist the building maintenance engineer’s help in off-hours deliveries. We leave things in odd places. We get kids to deliver for us. We slip quietly past the door of the recipient, hanging the gift from the doorknob while he or she is teaching. Yesterday, I left a gift on top of the printer that I know my “giftee” uses. I found out when she had art class on and left her gift with the art teacher to be delivered when her class returned to their room.
The wildest and craziest gift delivery had to be the time my friend the music teacher had my name. She convinced the engineer to help her out. In fact, when all was done, I found a polaroid picture of him in his elf hat on my desk. I got in that morning to find a warning sign on my door: “Caution. Deer Droppings Ahead.” I opened the door cautiously to find — “droppings” in the form of chocolate covered raisins, carefully placed in little mounds on small sheets of paper all around the room. It took me half the morning, with students help, to get them picked up. Of course, I shared. It’s become part of building legend, much like the banana in the boa.
Our students enjoy this, too. Mine keep asking, “What did you get today? Do you know who has your name? Do you think you know? Do you have any clues?” I have too many suspects; that’s the problem! It could be anyone from the music teacher (she loves the same kinds of coffees I’ve been getting) to the police liaison officer (I caught the secretary delivering, and she’s not playing this year). So far my “Santa” has delivered (or had delivered) a different flavor of coffee each day with a pretty seasonal mug. Oh, except for the day the coffee was packaged with a cute cartoon titled “Java Junkie”. It looked suspiciously like me. Hmmm: maybe the art teacher? She doesn’t drink coffee, but the music teacher is her best friend and could certainly advise.
So far I’ve unwrapped Chestnuts by the Fire, Hot Butter Rum, and After Dinner Mint. Mmm!
And yes, I’ll take pictures of the new mugs to post when the week is over and my Santa is revealed.

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>220, 221, Whatever it takes

>The entire school is bouncing. I expect the building itself to go boing, boing, boing any time now, with the amount of pre-holiday energy inside it. One of our specialists commented the other day, “Ms. M. has the ‘too-cool-for-school’ class this year, and you have the energetic one.” She was right. My class, full of really nice kids from wonderful parents, has turned into the elementary equivalent of Animal Planet. Since tranquilizer darts are frowned upon in public schools (I’m KIDDING, I’m kidding!), I had to resort to creative drama to bring them to attention.
My class, as a whole, was quiet exactly twice yesterday.
The questions of the day revolved around Christmas and Santa. All. Day. Long. “Is Santa real?” “How many reindeer does Santa have?” “Is Santa Claus real?” “How did all this Santa stuff start, anyway?” “Is Santa real?”
These are 6th graders, ages eleven and twelve. They’re old enough to know the truth, but do they? I can’t take a chance on destroying someone’s innocence and having their parents hit the roof. So I gave them my stock answer: it depends on who you ask. Well, that didn’t last long.
A few years ago, I took a class in storytelling from a professional storyteller. I relied on those skills to get the students’ attention yesterday. When they asked me how many reindeer there were, I stopped, put on my hmmm, there’s a story in here somewhere pose, and waited for quiet. Amazingly, quiet descended almost immediately.
“How many reindeer? Well, it depends on who you ask. If you ask Clement C. Moore, he’d have said Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen.” They were almost nodding along with me. Some were counting on their fingers. “Now of course you recall the most famous reindeer of all.”
Rudoph!” they chimed in.
“And Rudolph makes nine. But there’s a tenth reindeer, too. Do you know her name?”
One highly gifted child knew. “Olive!!!”
Yes, Olive the other reindeer… you know, the one who “…used to laugh and call him names.”
And that was just math class.
The “Is Santa real?” question wouldn’t die. They finally cornered me during Classroom Guidance on my “It depends on who you ask” with the statement “We’re asking you.
Thank goodness for the Internet.
I found a copy of Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, told them the story, and read them the editorial. For those few moments, they were spellbound.
I’m not sure what kinds of tricks I’ll pull out of my hat next week. Or the week after that. Know any good holiday stories for tweens? I’ll take them!

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>Tea bags and sanity

>

Anyone who is a parent or works with children knows that the excitement of Christmas can cause some escalating (read: wilder and wilder) behavior. We have twelve days of school left until the winter break starts, and the kids in my class are already bouncing off the walls. At least, their pencils and pens are.

I went into the office at lunchtime with a pink referral slip in hand. A fifth grade teacher took one look at me and said, “Oh! I need one of those, too!” By the end of the day, the principal had a mailbox full of pink. I guess I’m not alone in having a bouncy class.

My email to the guidance counselor had an image of Dr. Seuss’ Grinch. We decided that any of our mediators who haven’t returned their contracts will be suspended from the fun we have planned next week. We ask these kids to be responsible role models, and they’ve had all kinds of reminders and extra copies of the contract. Second chances? Heck, they’ve had four or five! Enough is enough, even if it’s a Grinchy idea.

So I went into the teachers’ lounge at the end of the lunch period and filled up my Lombardi mug with Good Earth Original Tea, the decaf version. Mmmm. It smells wonderful, total cinnamon heaven, and the mug is large and Lombardi, of course, is inspirational. As I waited for my class to come in from lunch recess, I was already feeling calmer. I remarked to my 6th grade co-worker that if the Grinch had been drinking Good Earth tea, maybe he wouldn’t have robbed the Whos down in Whoville.

I didn’t start this post with the intention of it being an ad for herbal teas. What the heck, it works for me! I felt like my “small heart grew three sizes” when I started inhaling the aroma.
And yes, here’s a picture of the mug.

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>Baby, it’s cold outside!

>

Oh, the weather outside may be frightful, but it’s still delightful inside. I can stay indoors, sip a cup of coffee, and listen to Christmas music.

Yes, the truth comes out. I Like Christmas Music. I could listen to it all year round. When the stores start playing songs of the season, my family will listen closely and identify our favorite songs, artists, and arrangements. My (our) collection of Christmas music is quite, um, varied. Some might say eclectic. It leans toward acappella groups and jazz/blues artists, but not entirely. Some are contemporary, some traditional, some old, some new. Some names you’d recognize, some you wouldn’t. Many of the unfamiliar artists’ albums are my favorites.

I’ve been playing Gloria Estefan’s “Christmas in your Eyes” when I get to school in the morning. I wave my ID card in front of the locked entrance, come in, start the coffee, and get myself settled at my desk. As soon as I’m ready to work, I push play. The heat’s not on yet when I arrive, so I depend on the music to warm me up. Gloria’s music comes through for me every time. She sings a luscious arrangement of “Have yourself a merry little Christmas” with the back-up of Singers Unlimited. Her “Silver Bells” makes me want to stand up and dance. My favorite on this album has to be the simple yet lovely Silent Night, sung in both English and Spanish. I can’t sing along with this one; I need to sit back and listen.

While the thermometers may read below zero, and I need my fingerless gloves to type when I arrive, inside my classroom it’s all warmth — the warmth that comes from good tunes and a good mood, a warm heart and warm thoughts.

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>It really is the thought that counts.

>You might be a teacher if your home has a few of these scattered about. They’re the cute little decorative things proclaiming that teachers are the salt of the earth, fabulous people, the greatest ever — all of which, of course, are true.
I won’t give you advice on how or where to pick out a holiday gift for a special teacher — the pretty Mir does that better. I’ll tell you, instead, a story of some of my favorite “teacher” gifts.


Ten years ago (was it really that long? Sheesh) the Green Bay Packers were on their way to the Super Bowl and I had one lone Dallas Cowboy fan in my 6th grade class. The other kids gave him a very hard time, but he took it with good humor. This student got me a Packer ornament for Christmas. Thoughtful? You bet.
I keep a popsicle-stick craft piece on my bookshelf. It’s cute and handmade, but it makes me smile because I remember the girl coming into the room that morning with her glue bottle still open, putting the last sticks in place. It was just like her homework; her intentions were good, but she was an endless procrastinator.
One Christmas the trendy items were blanket throws. They were inexpensive and came in a variety of colors and patterns. I received several, and each giver was creative. One came with a box of popcorn and a gift card for movie rentals. Another included a box of hot cocoa and and a cute holiday mug. Blanket throws — a person can never have too many, and the parents & kids who gave these put a lot of thought into their gift giving.
The bear says, “Teachers rule,” but maybe it’s more accurate to say that we do our best to measure up. I know that we’ll keep on doing what we can to make the world a brighter place. Thanks for the memories.

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>My internal GPS failed — kinda

>I attended a professional conference in Madison today with our school counselor. She and I work together to train and supervise our peer mediators, so when the opportunity came up to learn more, we jumped at it. Or, I should say, we drove ourselves to it.
If you don’t know Wisconsin’s fair capital city, let me describe it for you. It is part government, part commerce, and a large part university. It’s located on and between a couple of lovely lakes and at least one smaller waterway, so the roads are not exactly on a square grid. Our conference was at a hotel/conference center almost smack dab in the middle between the University and the Capitol building, on the isthmus between the two main lakes. This meant it was easy to find (Thanks, MapQuest), but a little tough to get to. Why the disparity? One way streets.
We pulled up to a parallel parking spot, plugged the meter, and planned to come back and move the vehicle after our hour was up. We went in, registered, and enjoyed the opening presentation. My colleague slipped out of our first breakout session to move her minivan — and didn’t come back.
Forty minutes later, she came in, breathless and looking frazzled. During our break, she told me that she’d gotten disoriented (okay, lost) on the one way streets. She could see the hotel, but couldn’t get to the main parking garage entrance. During her ordeal, she started down a one-way street the wrong way, ran a red light, endured many impatient horn honkin’ drivers, and narrowly avoided getting ticketed. Finally, safe in the underground garage, she had to back up because her minivan only fit in one section. The other had a low ceiling proclaiming in large red letters “No Trucks or Vans Beyond This Point.” She decided not to take a chance with her Grand Caravan.
The conference was good; we got some new ideas and were reassured that we are doing well in our training methods. We left shortly after lunch to (gulp) brave the one-way streets and go home.
My limited knowledge of the city combined with the compass in her minivan helped us go in the right direction. By keeping the capitol dome on our right, we confirmed that we were heading toward the highway we wanted. But when we left the center of town, it was a little tougher. I think she will forever tease me about the way I kept giving her two choices: “Well, my gut feeling is this, but we could also do that.” And “I think we’re paralleling the road we came in on, and eventually we’ll make a right and get there. Or maybe we’ll go straight and this street will curve to meet it.” “There’s a McDonald’s. We can’t be too far from civilization as we know it.” Sure enough, the road curved to the right, landing at the intersection with the McDonald’s that brought us to our destination: the road out of town. (The intersection took us out of town; the McD’s only provided us with sustenance for the journey.)
The rest of the trip was uneventful, thank goodness. I came home to hug Husband, Amigo, and the bunnies, and then get a haircut, color, and massage. But that, my blogosphere friends, is another story.

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>Mind spinning, round and round

>There are too many things on my mind tonight for a coherent post. Or maybe not. I’m off to a conference tomorrow in a neighboring big city, and I spent a great portion of my day preparing plans for the substitute teacher who will teach my class tomorrow. We had a staff meeting after school with some pretty heavy issues to deal with. After supper and after helping Amigo with homework, I corrected four — count ’em, 4! — stacks of papers to be added to my gradebook when I get back on Thursday. If my sub corrects the work that’s done tomorrow, I’ll only have a few things to score on Thursday night. If she doesn’t, well, I’ll pour some apple cider for my sore throat and settle myself in for a long haul. I’m overdue for a doctor’s appointment and overdue for a haircut, too.
One of my dearest friends, a wonderful woman who had a mastectomy about 18 months ago, is undergoing more reconstructive surgery tomorrow. I promised her I’d wear pink and send positive thought waves in her general direction while I’m at the conference. What else can a person do? She’ll be in surgery for a minimum of five hours, spend a little while in recovery, and then go right home. Don’t even get me started on the injustice of the drive-through surgical center mentality.
This is someone, however, with an amazing amount of resilience. She sported a “Bad Boob” sign on her right breast the day after she announced the diagnosis. She sewed scarves in a multitude of colors to match her outfits while she lost her hair from chemo. It was a red-letter day when she realized that she had enough hair to have a Bad Hair Day! She began exercising regularly and walked her first marathon roughly one year after her radiation ended. And through it all, she was always there for the rest of us when we needed someone. She also loaned me the feather boa to wrap around the banana — but that’s another story altogether.
Tomorrow, the doctors are re-doing the reconstruction of her right breast and making the left one reasonably equal in size.
With that in mind, my over-due haircut and my sore throat are small potatoes. Mind spinning? Yes, it still is, but it’ll spin a lot less when I know she’s out of surgery and feeling better.

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>Truth, no matter how trivial, is stranger than fiction.

>In honor of Children’s Book Week, the library- media specialist in my school sets up a trivia contest. She asks two questions on the morning announcements: one for the primary grades, and one for the intermediate. Kids who know or can find the answer go to the library during recess and enter a prize drawing.
Last time she did this, I asked her if teachers could try it. She decided that teachers could do it if they could answer all three daily questions. Yes, she had three at that time — one for Kindergarten/first grade, one for grades 2 and 3, and then an intermediate question for grades 4-5-6. Well, I answered all three the first time I tried it, and won a cool trivia book, Just Curious, Jeeves.
Well, she sent out the student questions in advance, two per day, last week. I had a few minutes, so I answered what I could and sent it back to her. I had 95% right. 95%, I tell you, without looking up a single one! Watch out, Ken Jennings! So she decided to put together a whole new set of challenging questions for teachers.
I hope my co-workers don’t get mad at me for ruining the curve.
Here’s the best part: research is allowed. I can look things up in books, ask my students, and even use the Internet. So here goes: today’s question is “What is author Avi’s real name?” I’ve found at least three answers so far, so she may need to accept a variety of responses.
According to interviews published by reputable sources, Avi’s twin sister gave him the nickname Avi because she couldn’t pronounce his real name. Now the real name?
Avi’s real name is either Avi Wartis, Edward Irving Wortis, or Dghtyto Bvith Bnpht Ingworht Quvopt Jr.
I’ll stick with Daisy, myself.

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