>(Inspired by the incredible Kelly at Mocha Momma)
10. How to dress fashionably. Not going to happen. Don’t even think about it.
9. Remember to scrub my nose in the morning. Since I’ve developed a snoring problem (quiet up there in the peanut gallery!), I’ve used the funny nose strips that football players wear. They seem to help me breathe better at night, but the adhesive is a mess. I am constantly waking up in the morning, tossing the strip in the wastebasket, blowing my nose, and ending up with a schnozz covered with sticky tissue remnants.
8. Master all the features of my cell phone. I can call out, receive calls, text message, and even take pictures with the camera setting. But there are all kinds of shortcuts, like a text message dictionary, that I’ve discovered and I haven’t used. Yet.
7. Housekeeping. Carol Brady had Alice; I pay a cleaning service to come in once a month and do the basics. Maybe I have learned this one; I learned to pay someone else to do what I can’t.
6. Keep on track with appointments and regular checkups. My hearing aids need service, I’m behind by one dental cleaning, and if I think about it, I’ll realize there’s more. I’ll choose not to think about it, instead.
5. How to eat spaghetti without spilling sauce on myself. I’m getting older, but I’m not Old. Dinner shouldn’t be all over my shirt — yet.
4. Going to bed early means wake up early. If I’m extra tired and go to bed half and hour early, it’s inevitable that I’ll wake up an hour before my alarm.
3. Going back to bed means bad dreams. Always. I’m better off getting up and (if possible) taking a nap later.
2. A little goes a long way. Especially when it’s chocolate, even more when it’s dark chocolate. But if that small piece tastes fabulous, more would be heavenly, right? Uh-huh.
1. Get to know and cheer for a new Green Bay Packer quarterback. Well, give me time, okay? I can do this. Heck, I recovered after Bart Starr left. But I was a lot younger and more resilient back then.