Let me back up. I just vacuumed the kitchen floor. Vacuumed. Not washed, not mopped, not swept, not Swiffer wet-jetted. Vacuumed. I was out of fluid for the Wet-Jet, and I wasn’t ready to get down on my knees and scrub. Besides, all the good rags were in the wash.

Let me back up a little more. I just vacuumed up a pile of coffee grounds. Freshly ground, organic coffee grounds. The floor smelled great. So did my pants. If I’d been wearing brown, maybe I wouldn’t have thrown them right in the laundry. But anyway, back to the story. My tiny kitchen was half covered by, no, maybe… Okay. I’ll back up again.

It was a typical weekday evening. I made my lunch, got my clothes ready for morning, made sure my Kindle was charged. Of course I charged my Kindle to get ready for bed; doesn’t everyone? As a final step, I usually set up the coffeemaker for morning. The filtered water was ready, the coffee filter in place, but before I could measure my life in coffee spoons, I needed one more ingredient. As chief groundskeeper of Chez OkayByMe, I gathered my materials: coffee grinder, container, and cleaning brush.

It all began well. The grinder was working well, sending the organically grown, fair trade processed, deliciously blended beans through the blades to become my refreshing beverage of choice. I inhaled with pleasure. When the container filled almost to the top, I applied the small wooden brush to dust the remaining grounds from the grinder. An important step to prepare the grinder for storage, this was also my undoing.

You guessed it, readers. I spilled. Not all of the coffee grounds fell to their death, but at least one third of what I’d just ground hit the, well, ground. With some on my pants and some on my shoes and more, much more, on the floor, I called out to Chuck. “Is the vacuum still downstairs?” He brought it to me and cautiously backed out of the kitchen without daring to say a word.

So there you have it. At least my vacuum will smell good for a while. It’ll smell of freshly ground organic coffee.