>You might be a teacher if:

• TGIF has more meaning to you than to most.
• You haven’t planted your garden yet because you’re working on report cards.
• Your work email shows that the people you work with are feeling just as stressed and punchy as you are.

From Mrs. Puff to all staff : As you have noticed, we are adding some stylish new furniture to the teachers’ lounge. All items not needed will be removed and sold at Daisy’s rummage sale in June.

Reply to all staff from Mrs. Potts: It is my fervent hope that we can add a lounge singer to the decor. That is my highest hope, although a deep fryer and chocolate fountain would be nice, too. Shall I run the ad and get started on the auditions?

Reply to all from Mrs. Petunia: Oh, I’m good at this! I’m a professional solo-ensemble festival judge, remember? I just have to curb my inner Simon Cowell. You know, the one who would say, “Well, the quality of your singing would math the ‘stunning’ piece of furniture we call a ‘cottage chic’ couch.” (note: the couch is hideous.)

Reply to all from new Maintenance dude: As I’m only subbing here for a few days I wouldn’t normally intrude on these email discussions, but, as a singer/pianist (and choir director/music teacher/organist) I felt that perhaps I should throw my hat into the ring… Of course, the maintenance department would need to OK it first.
Jack from Maintenance

Reply to all from Mrs. Picasso: Ok. I vote for Jack the lounge singer. No need to ask for permission if we have a tip jar. Jack-the-lounge-singer, do you have an old black tuxedo coat? Because we need to keep the place upscale.
I say we use the extra money for blenders for tropical drinks. Non-alcoholic of course. Smoothies perhaps.

Reply to all from Mrs. Piccolo: What you folks don’t know is that I used to be a lounge singer!

Reply to all from Mrs. Petunia: Oh, Mrs. P., you topped me there. I only did singing telegrams in college. Oh, the jobs we’ll take to pay our tuition!

Reply to all from the boss, taking a break from an administrative meeting at the main office: GET BACK TO WORK!!!

Reply to all from Mrs. Puff: Oh, we’d better not tell her about the chair races in the hall.

Now, dear readers, can you guess which of the Perfectly Pleasant P’s is me, Daisy? Hint: a few of my coworkers have started calling me “Simone”.